Tuesday, April 28, 2009

So I'm going to Costa Rica

and the advice I keep getting from people is to "watch out for swine flu".

Well I hate to rain tamiflu on your global pandemic, but Mexico and the United States are where you have to watch out for swine flu.

The only thing I have to watch out for is sunburn and strained eyeballs from reading too much on the beach.

Also crocodiles, sharks, scorpions, venomous snakes, jaguars, dengue fever, and malaria.

And sloths.

Man, these things creep me out.

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

At last!

We finally know how candy corn behaves in space!

Thursday, April 02, 2009

The only good reason to wear a watch

"Carry some text with you or wear a digital watch throughout the day. To do a reality test, read the words or the numbers on the watch. Then, look away and look back, observing the letters or numbers to see if they change. . . If the characters do change, are not normal, or do not make sense, then you are most probably dreaming."

-Stephen LaBerge,
Lucid Dreaming

I noticed people were changing their faces as I walked past and I thought that couldn't be right, so I looked down and realized that I wasn't wearing a watch. Luckily there happened to a manual wall clock, so I looked at that. Then I looked again and again, and it had changed several hours in a matter of seconds. I knew I was dreaming, so I walked around changing everything about the dream to the way I wanted. When I was done, not being creative enough to direct the dream beyond that point, I woke up.